Sunday, February 10, 2008

She Doesn't , But She Does

She doesn’t listen to everything I say, do things my way, tell me it’s ok, or see me everyday…but she does scream, “Hey!”

The full alphabet she doesn’t know, to bed she doesn’t go, and the lawn she doesn’t mow…but she does love to, “Watch a show.”

She doesn’t back me in a fight, tell me it’s alright, like to go “Na-Night,” or band-aid a bite…but she does hug me so tight.

She doesn’t like to share, meet me over there, wash my underwear, or brush my hair…but she does join me in prayer.

She doesn’t take away my fears, remember the years, buy us some beers, or introduce me to peers…but she does live in my tears.

She doesn’t settle for any drink, reach the bathroom sink, or wear it if it’s not pink…but she does look just like me, I think.

She doesn’t stay up late with me, take me on a shopping spree, or even always agree…but she does call me, “Daddy.”

She doesn’t hear me say, “Daddy loves you” everyday…but she does let me call her my “Special K”.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Who am I: Finding Yourself

Jake and Kwynn Cartoon

A "self created" cartoon version of my daughter Kwynn and I

Being recently divorced, a student, a father, and well...human, I currently find myself on a voyage to find me. As mentioned in a previous post, I was assigned in school to write a paper describing "Who I Am". This was a very difficult assignment for me because I do not know who I am. That's just it, I am trying to find myself. I am trying to find out exactly what it is that makes me who I am. If I was to write a paper on describing who I am, the paper would only be accurate for a short period of time, only to lose it's truthfulness with a "changing me".

In talking with friends and co-workers about this paper, we came to a conclusion that it would be more interesting if the paper was on the person I want to become instead of who I currently am; because as humans we are constantly changing as the life and world around us change. During the discussion, I was given the following quote by Joseph B. Wirthlin, member of the LDS Quorum of the 12 Apostles. He shares his thoughts on this subject by using a quote from author/writer George Bernard Shaw:

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." - George Bernard Shaw

"Don't worry about searching for who you are; focus your energies on creating the kind of person you want to be! You will discover that as you pursue that journey you will not only find yourself, but chances are you will be pleasantly surprised and proud of the person you find along the way." - Joseph B. Wirthlin

Joseph B. Wirthlin defines exactly what the people of this world would love to do-trust themselves enough to let go and be the unique individual they really are. However, society is so restrictive on who or what is acceptable that people are scared to be who the really are-different. It is so much easier to follow what everyone else is because the path has already been laid before them.

I admit, I would much rather walk on a paved sidewalk instead of having to create my own path. Call it lazy, I call it human nature; fear of not being accepted, fear of actually finding out who I am.

What if Elder Wirthlin is incorrect? What if I am not happy with the person I have come to know as myself along the journey? Well, that brings me to present day. Like most people, I am faced with that question today, right now. The journey of finding yourself doesn't end until life's journey ends. I feel it is then we will find who we are as we look back the paved or unpaved paths we took that we will have a smile on our faces, a cold beverage in hand, and a complete knowledge of the person we are at that point in time.